the one with the paula deen pie.

10 March 2010

004

{prologue}

it's sunday.
the WHOLE griffith family is in walmart.
they've just spent almost 3 hours grocery shopping.
they have 2 overflowing carts of groceries.
they're standing in line at the deli to get lunch meats.

{begin scene}

rachel: crap. i forgot to get cream of chicken soup.
shane: run and get it. there's a long line, i'll still be waiting when you get back.
rachel: alright. be back in a minute.
*rachel starts to speed walk from deli to soup aisle*

*rachel sees something out of the corner of her eye*
rachel [to herself]: wait...was that paula deen on a pie?!?!
*rachel makes mental note to check that out when she gets back from soup run*

*rachel dumps a few cans of soup in the overflowing cart*
rachel: i've got to check something out real quick.
shane: what is it???
rachel: i just saw paula deen on a pie!!!
*shane rolls his eyes*

side note: rachel loves paula deen.
she's the only other person that says yall as much as she does.
rachel & paula deen are both georgia girls.
paula deen just might be rachel's hero.
like she LOVES paula deen yall.
alot.


*rachel picks up the pie*
rachel [to herself]: oh dear god. it's paula deen on a pie. in walmart.
*rachel grins like the cheshire cat from alice in wonderland*

*rachel walks over to shane*
rachel: shane i HAVE to get this pie.
shane: ummm no. that pie is like 8 bucks. i already saw it.
*rachel is giddy like a school girl*
rachel: yeah, i know. but it's paula freaking deen!!!
*shane rolls his eyes again*

*rachel puts the the pie back and she's a little huffy*

shane: what kind of lunch meats do we want???
rachel: whatever.
*rachel is hell bent on this pie & shane knows it*

*rachel puts the pie in the cart while shane isn't looking*

*rachel walks up to the deli counter*
rachel: let's get some ham. yum.
*shane knows his wife is up to something*
shane: okay...???...
rachel: what??? i'm in the mood for ham.
*shane rolls his eyes again*

*whoops!!! shane is the one that puts the lunch meat in the cart*
shane: you're getting the pie?!?! the $8 pie you could make?!?!
rachel: but it's a paula deen pie.
shane: so. you're from georgia too. you can make a better pie.
rachel: i know, but it's PAULA DEEN. on a pie. in walmart.
*rachel huffs and puts the pie back on the shelf*

*the pregnant side of rachel told her she was getting that damn pie*

*rachel put the pie back in the cart & gave shane the puppy dog look*
rachel: shane, i NEED this pie. i ain't joking.
*shane sighs*
shane: fine. get the pie.

side note: see shane knows his wife.
he knows if he doesn't buy the pie now, she'll send him to get the pie later.
and she'll blame it on pregnancy cravings to guilt him into it.
oh yes...shane knows his wife.


*shane bought the pie*

*rachel really wanted to eat the pie in the truck right out of the pan*

{end scene}

027

{epilogue}

the pie made it home in one piece.
the pie sat there for almost 2 days...which probably irritated shane.
rachel started eating the pie yesterday.

*RIP paula deen pie*

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69 comments:

RWL said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

love it.

nanaofnc said...

Ha! You're too funny. That's the way I feel about her pans and dishes! I just know that pie had to be fabulous! xo,

V and Co. said...

lol!!!!
"yeah, i know. but it's paula freaking deen!!!"

that's freaking funny! ;) better than when you told me on the phone! you didn't mention the whole "you are both from georgia...you can make a better pie" thing!!!

Purple Quilter Queen said...

That was great! It was Paula Deen! Heeelllllo?!?!?! Jenn

Tonya's Sewing Room said...

that is hilarious, love it and i love paula deen as well. and i say ya'll probably just as much. from NC

Michelle said...

you are just way tooo cute!! love it!

Kristine said...

omg, rachel, you are FREAKING killing me here! I love Paula Deen, too. Nuthin' quite like a woman who is made outta pure butter....

EmileeHope said...

Love it!

Tricia said...

Lol! Awesome!

Mishka said...

You crack me up... thanks for the morning chuckle.

Crystal Hendrix said...

LOL I love it :D

Barbara said...

Tears of laughter are STREAMING down my face

..shane: what kind of lunch meats do we want???
rachel: whatever...

oh oh, the power of that single word !!!

I needed this h00t today - many many thanks from a SC girl !

Mandy Todd said...

Hilarious!

Did you tell Shane that it was over 2 pounds of Paula Deen goodness and he couldn't put a price tag on that?!

Glad to see he did realize he couldn't put a price tag on a happy pregnant wife diggin' in to a Paula Deen pie...how was it?

One day, I'm going to make it to Savannah and eat myself to a heart attack at her restaurant, y'all.

Jewel said...

ROFL... ahhh I killed a quart of vanilla ice cream the other night.... so don't blame yourself for murdering it :)

jaybird said...

i think i actually had more fun reading this than hearing you give me the play by play on the phone!! now you just need to share with everyone how you can't handle having an empty red cake plate... cause that story deserves to be shared too... mm.. cupcakes!! ;-)

Elizabeth said...

I'm totally ROFL! I love your narration! And anyone who is pregnant with their fourth baby totally deserves a Paula Deen pie!

allsewnup said...

It's a wise man that knows when to give in! Love the play-by-play! ;o)

Carolyn

Jeannie said...

That is too funny! Between her and Pioneer Woman my cooking is complete :)

Designs by Jessie said...

That is so funny! I love Paula! I made her pumpkin triffle at thanksgiving and it was a big hit! Paula is everything i want to be when i grow up!

Libby said...

PAULA WOULD BE SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!

Libby said...

PAULA WOULD BE SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!

Madame Samm said...

Y'all one crazy apple eating pie eater you...lol
blessings madame samm

April M. said...

Too funny - So how was the pie?

My favorite Paula Dean moment http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBZsA3yoKRQ

Have you seen her bakeware?

Jane's Fabrics and Quilts said...

You are too funny, I adore her too and yes I would have spent $8 even if I could have made it. funny how our husbands know us so well!
If you get a chance stop by my blog, the blog makeover I won is up and she did a wonderful job!

Jenn said...

oh thats hilarious! Pregnancy does have some strange cravings. Mine was very cherry jelly belly jelly beans. I could have eaten them by the truckload.

Tracey J said...

He should know by #4 not to come between a pregnant woman and her pie! :)

(BTW, I was eating Sweettarts jelly beans last week, and thinking of you). :)

ange said...

That was great ! I LOVE Paula Deen also..I am not from GA but I swear I should be from the south. So many of my manerisms and thinking is just like a southern gal. I say yall way more than a girl raised in CA ought to, but I just can't help myself :)

Anina said...

LOL.
Was the pie yummy?
We don't have a Walmart. :o(

Laurel H. said...

That. Is. Hilarious!!! How many of us have similar tugs-of-war with our spouses, played out in the line at the grocery store?!! Too funny!

~melissa p. said...

You are just so stinkin funny!! Thanks for the laugh!!

Amy B said...

Your story is hysterical. LOL @ work & getting dirty looks, but I couldn't stop.

At least the hubs put up a good fight! But not nobody can get in between a momma-to-be and what her heart desires :)

Cara said...

LOL love it. DH loves Paula Deen too so whenever I need a Southern recipe for him I look her up!

abucketofsunshine said...

Love it! I got my Paula Deen rolling pin 2 months ago and just can't bring myself to use it...still with wrapper thingy on it...:)

Mary Grace McNamara said...

That Shane is a good man!

Have you tried Paula's creme de menthe brownies? They are out of this world scrumptious! Totally KILLER delicious! Now that I'm thinking about them, maybe I'll have to make them on Sunday! Ooooh, something to look forward to!

MGM

Jennifer said...

I *heart* Paula Deen. She's super funny IRL, too! I just might have to make a special trip to Wallyworld. I have a thing for baked goods. And Paula. PS You need to update my link on your blogroll, chica!

Trisha said...

Love your post.

So, Rachel, was it worth the $8?

Diane said...

Ok, when I stop laughing I am going to have to go to walmart to get the freak'n paula dean pie... and I do not have the excuse of being preggers thank you very much!

pojeda said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
pojeda said...

Paula Deen!!!!! Oh YES!!!! You made my day!!!! Love it....and you! Feed that baby!!!!!

Kelly O. said...

was it any good? :)

SewCalGal said...

Did yall get some ice cream to go with that pie? Yumm.

SewCalGal
www.sewcalgal.blogspot.com

Quilt Nut said...

lol Rachel!!!

John said...

and that, my friends, is the power of a strong brand!

ps. did you see the paula deen episode of kathy griffin's show?

edyB said...

You should send this to Paula! She would love your story and laugh like crazy! Do it!

Denise :) said...

Way to hold firm & stand fast, Rachel! :)

Jennifer said...

You make my day! How funny . . . but oh how true!

Hope things are going well up north!

Claire said...

LOVE IT! the whole time i was reading you're post all I think about was Desperate Housewives on ABC (LOVE THAT SHOW)! Then when I read,

"see shane knows his wife.
he knows if he doesn't buy the pie now, she'll send him to get the pie later.
and she'll blame it on pregnancy cravings to guilt him into it.
oh yes...shane knows his wife."


...it sounded just like something the narrator of Desperate Housewives would say at the end of the show, when it's wrapping up.

Thank Goodness for being pregnant...you can usually swing thing your way.

I hope the pis tasted good....it almost make me want a pie now!

Freda said...

That is hiliarious! I miss being prego for that very reason. Maybe soon we can add to the family.

KarrieLyne said...

*laughing* You totally crack me up!! It's a good thing our hubbys know us. My hubby is the same way. And sometimes....if I'm not getting my way....I just look at him with "that look" and remind him....happy wife, happy life! hahahaha! Works almost every time :)

Karen said...

Love it! Love it! Love it!!!! Never stand in the way of a Paula Deene fan or should I have said...a pregnant Paula Deene fan!!!!!!

Magoo said...

"PAula Freaking Deen?!" HAHAHAHA, that is the best thing i have ever read.

Dandelion Quilts said...

LOLOLOL...great story. I can relate to it in many ways.

wishes, true and kind said...

LOL! Whenever my husband visited his grandmother when he was a young man, she would send him home with a pie (a woman known for her excellent pies). One day as she gave him his pie he told her that on the last trip he just couldn't wait till he got back home and had eaten the pie in the car from California to Oregon.

"But you didn't have any silverware! How did you eat the pie?"

"With my hands," he said showing her a scooping motion with one hand while the other managed the steering wheel. She always loved to tell people that story.

Christine said...

Oh my goodness you crack me up!!! Love it! :)

Jackie said...

The pie always wins!

momawake said...

I have to know--was it worth it?

Sherry said...

Too darn funny! I can relate..that's why my hubby calls me spoiled. How was the pie, I'm curious? I love Paula Deen and you. You always make me laugh! :)

Muriƫl said...

Really funny! Although I have no idea who Paula is... sorry!
I hope you kept the packaging!!

Susan R said...

I'm on my way to Walmart now. The only problem is I have to drive 50 miles to get there. We don't have any Walmarts near me - drats!

Thanks for the story; I so love your blog. From the music to the creations, the fabric, the stories...well I'm hooked.

Now...where are my keys?

Susan

natalie. beyond the reef said...

...because, as my friend's husband says, "When momma's happy, everyone's happy..."
He says it with a southern Tennessee/Florida country boy drawl, too. Oh, did I mention he was a doctor? There ya go.
Repeat after me.
When Momma's happy, everyone's happy.

Thimbleanna said...

Hahahaha! You're TOOOO funny!!!

quiltcetera said...

awww I wish I was from Georgia. Whenever I say y'all, people just look at me funny. I can just see them thinking "Does she know she's Canadian?"

We should have a pie eating contest and Julie could be the judge. I could totally eat the whole yummy looking pie.

Ariane said...

That is such a cute story!! I sometimes feel the same way when I see something I really want. Thanks for sharing it with us.

HoopDeeDoo said...

I know everyone says LOL but I really did LOL! Have you been spying on my family?

Poppy Cottage said...

Okay, that was just down right hilarious! You are too cute!!

CocoJ126 said...

LOL!!!

Dear 8lb 7 ounce Baby Jesus,

Please let Paula Deen still be selling her $8.00 pies at WalMart the next time I am preggie? And Please will you help us out on the preggie part sooner than later? I really want a new baby....and now I really want to try that pie.

Sincerely...and I know you are not offended by my prayer...please help those who are...show them that you are funny too.
Amen.

amylouwho said...

you are hilarious! I love pie! And Paula Deen. wal-mart, not so much. Plus we don't have a grocery store in ours....

deb poole aka The Barefoot Quilter said...

i LOVE Miss Paula also! She is my favorite of all the cooking "experts." I want to have her and her wonderful Michael over to my house for dinner and a game of cards and I bet if I asked her real nice.......She would come!lol And Rachel, when I get her RSP, i'll call your house so can hurry up and come to my house for dinner too! I will have Miss Paula bring the pie for dessert.

Stitch Memories said...

you are so funny!! I can't believe you waited 2 days!!

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