baby steps.

31 March 2015

escapade loves poseidon.
so, here's the truth, i've been battling some health problems.

i have suffered from anemia for years, thanks to an iron deficiency.
with each pregnancy, it became progressively worse.
i felt it getting worse this last summer/fall, but i tried my damndest to push through it.
that's what we moms and business owners do, right?

well, apparently, i was pushing too hard.
or maybe i'm just a stubborn southern woman.
either way, there finally came a day, when i just had to cave.

on top of having iron-deficiency anemia, i've been hard on myself.
i've been disgusted with my inability to just be myself.
(why are we so hard on ourselves?)
my body wouldn't let me get off my couch to cook supper, let alone, run a business.
needless to say, i was in a dark place, emotionally, as well as physically.
and that's the truth.

as most of y'all know, i stopped teaching, blogging, and hanging out with you via social media.
behind the scenes, i stopped quilting all together.
quilting is just the surface, really.
and at the end of the day, the things that mattered most, i really felt like i was failing at.
like being a good wife, mother, and friend.

i am behind on everything under the sun, BUT i'm writing to tell y'all that i am seeing a light at the end of this tunnel.
thanks to a new medical course of action, i'm starting to feel more and more like myself.
i'm thankful that we seem to have tapped into my anemia when we did and have things turning around in the right direction.
and furthermore, i'm super thankful for every single one of you that has reached out to inquire about my family and i.

i'm trying to take baby steps here and get my feet wet.
even if it is, just dipping my toes in the shallow end.
so, if you're waiting on an order or an email, please know that i haven't forgotten about you! mean it!

xo, rachel

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76 comments:

Natalia from Piece N Quilt said...

I was just thinking about you the other day. Glad to hear there is light at the end of the tunnel. :)

Hildy said...

Hope you'll be better soon!

Mary Miller said...

I am sure such a chronic physical problem can also manifest into full blown depression. Hang in there, and keep working the issue. Know you are not alone!

harleywife57/ Mickey White said...

Will be praying for a fast , full recovery for you . Blessings to you and your family .

NorahS said...

Glad you are on the mend! Hope you feel better soon.

Rachael said...

Hey, I'm really proud of you and I'm really glad to be your friend. It's ok to be you. Tough times happen, they makes the good times sweeter & more recognizable. You got this & we're here for you.

Julie @ Jaybird Quilts said...

You got this. I love you so much & you know I'm here for you.

Beth said...

So glad you've found some help! I know what anemia is like. I hope you continue to recover!

Penny said...

Oh dear, Rachel! I've missed you so much! Now I understand what has happened & will add you to my little prayers! Please continue to take those baby steps & feel better soon! Hugs to you and your family!! Penny in S CA

Marly said...

Give yourself time to get on top of the world. One step at a time is what it takes. I'm glad you felt well enough to write about it; that's a big step.

Sandy said...

As I reminded you, there is strength in numbers. Look at all these prayers & good wishes. You have a wonderful community of people who really care about you! Baby steps today. So proud of you! Love you.

Allison said...

I've been thinking about you...sending love and take your time feeling better and getting back to yourself. We'll all still be here when you get back to love and support you!!

Purple Quilter Queen said...

Praying for a full healthy recovery!! Take it one day at a time and you'll conquer all! We love ya Rachel!

trish said...

Oh Rachel! I wish I had known. I am so sorry for your health issues and feeling down. I am praying for you! hugs!!!

Bekah said...

Hugs!! Everyone has ups and downs - so glad to hear you're back on an up!!

Stacey said...

I hear ya! I think this past year has been hard on a lot of people. I know my life changed drastically this past year health wise, and I am trying to get a handle on it. It's hard though when doctors tell you no. But I am trying, and now things gotta change again. I totally understand, and I am here if you ever need someone to talk to, always. Behaving spoke in a while, but we are still friends. I hope the best for you, and pray for healing for you.

Amy Webb said...

Hugs friend! I had a brief bout with anemia and it was awful. I can't imagine how you've been feeling!! Love you tons and add my prayers and offer to be there for you to the rest of these! xoxo

carolann said...

Missed your posts. So glad to hear that you are feeling better. Sending a warm hug!

Renegade Quilter said...

Happy to hear that you are getting back into the swing of things. Take care of yourself!

Barbara McD said...

Hang in there, girlfriend! I suffer from depression, and every day is a struggle. IT DOES GET BETTER. Miss you and look forward to hearing from you again soon!

PamKittyMorning said...

Glad to hear you're on the mend. I've been wondering about you and how you were doing. Didn't want to pry, you know?xo

Diane said...

Praying for you - been wondering what was going on! Thanks for sharing. Looking forward to more Rachel!

Tamie said...

Healing thoughts and prayers headed your way.

tvbleak said...

Take your time, we will be here when you are ready. Self and family first and friends are here. :^)

Relentless Toil said...

All the very best to you.

mascanlon said...

So very glad you are taking baby steps! We missed you. Most of us are so hard on ourselves. Glad you're focusing ion health and family, we're right here waiting patiently.

qltmom9 said...

I had to get IV bags of iron before I found a product called IronC. I take B12 shots now.

Laura said...

Please take it slow and easy. No relapses! Hug the little ones for us. They are the most important

Christine S said...

Glad to hear you're seeing some light. Health stuff can really get us in a rut and like you said, behind on everything. I've been experiencing a very tough spell with my health too. Best wishes to you!

kimberlier said...

Take good care of yourself & very nice to hear you are beginning to feel like your old self. Will be thinking about you!

Lisa said...

Such a brave post. Heal well - I am so glad that you are starting to feel better. I hope you feel like yourself more and more each day xx.

taliana said...

I've missed you, chica! So glad you are starting to feel more like yourself. Be good to you... Be gentle. Hugs

Muriel said...

I'm happy to hear you are on a good road . Take care!

MIss Sherry said...

Miss Rachel... what a delight to see a blog post. Any steps are good things, baby or not. Who knew that feeling 'normal" was so wonderful after being in a funk. Praying for increasing joy and good health for you. WOO HOO!

EmileeHope said...

Glad to hear you are starting to feel better-we have missed you! Take all the time you need to get back to your self...we aren't going anywhere!

charlotte said...

Health issues are hard. We have less control. You are doing the right thing, taking care of yourself. You are much loved in this community and everyone understands. Keep healing and looking for the sunshine. You will get there.

Wendy said...

So happy to hear your sweet voice pop up in my email. Sending a hug and a prayer for you. Take those baby steps and know you have all of us quilters here thinking about you.

lindak21 said...

Glad to hear you're feeling better! Day by day. So many of us have been there and it certainly is no fun, but you'll make it! Just know you have loving support and make your health your priority. Thinking about you.

Robin Fonville said...

I've been thinking about you!!!! You are in my prayers!!! I think about you almost every day as I look at the beautiful pinwheel quilt hanging in my living room made for me by special friends using your patterns!!! Hugs!!!!!

SheriB said...

I am so glad you're feeling better. Be gentle with yourself and know you are not alone!

MaterialGirlQuilts said...

Hang in there sweetie!!! Take care of you most importantly and everything else can wait.

Karee said...

The road to recovery is a great road to be on! Just remember it is not a freeway/expressway.

Tips I still employ to fight iron deficient anemia: iron rich & vit C rich diet, keep celiac disease under control, get gamma globulin shots, take Vit C in OJ or supplement. And 20 minutes of sun each day outside.

Those may not be relevant to your situation but thought I would share my IDA tips.

God bless you as you recover and know that your friends here understand you and your fam come first! Hope you continue to feel better day by day!

Carol Tauber said...

So glad you are feeling better!

Sally K said...

Good thoughts headed your way. Chin up, buttercup!

Libby said...

Hugs to you!

KareBear said...

Blessings and best wishes for a speedy recovery.....big ((HUGS)) from the East Coast of Canada.

Camille Mendel said...

Sending well wishes your way. Get better soon.

Kathryn said...

I hope you are feeling better soon. We can only do what we can do.

Nettie said...

Hope this Spring brings lots of get well blessings to you. You are a really talented lady, with LOTS of fans.
Happy Easter to you and your family also.
Regards,
Nettie from Spanish Fork, Utah

Faye Nettles said...

Sweet Rachael, I am glad to know you are feeling better. That light is going to get brighter every day and that makes me happy for you.

Cherold said...

I am so glad you are starting to come out of the darkness. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

hugs,
Cheri

cheris46@hotmail.com

My Recent Favorite Books said...

Im glad you are feeling better!
I'm sending hugs and prayers from Kansas!

Susan said...

I'm glad that you're on the mend! ((((HUGS))))

julie said...

I was anemic for years until I found out I was gluten intolerant (the gluten damage made my gut unable to absorb iron in foods). No more gluten, no more anemia! Hope you feel better soon.

Heather O'Brien said...

Looking at all the comments before mine, I think I can say we all wish you the very best in your recovery. Personal strength and faith in ourselves is always a work in progress, sometimes it is necessary to take a step back from the world and just be for a while. As you can tell from the other comments you had the love and support of so many whether you knew it or not. Continued blessings of strength and peace as you take those babysteps.

B. J. Woodlee said...

Prayers fora speedy recovery.

Karen said...

So happy that you are starting to feel better. You need to put your health as your #1 priority...everything else will follow! Having said that...I've missed you! So happy you are back!

Michele T said...

So happy to hear that you are feeling better!! Wishing you all the best!

Elaine Walker said...

So glad you have turned the corner with this illness. Yes,WHY are we women so hard on ourselves? We need to love ourselves enough to accept the times we need to be nurtured. Glad you are back.

Darci said...

I am so sorry! I totally understand the depression. I had it after having my youngest 5 years ago and it was so bad I couldn't get out of bed. It took years to get better and I still struggle with bouts of it. Hugs girl. Worst things ever.

Karen said...

Aw girl! Was wondering what was going on. You were greatly missed

debbymom said...

We're here for you when you feel up to it. So glad to know you didn't give up on us.

Michelle B. said...

Hang in there....I've had those feelings myself so please don't feel like you are alone....day by day girl!!

Sandy Allen said...

So glad to hear you are doing better. Hope that light gets brighter every day!

Hugs!

mypiecedlife.com said...

Glad to hear you are doing better! There will be good days and bad days, but letting other people know that you are having health concerns is a step towards more good days. Unfortunately, I can relate to health issues making life difficult. It is a challenge to "be normal" but your new normal is what has to happen right now.

chapman1531 said...

Your work inspires me, Rachel, and I've wondered where you went. Take it from someone who has been where you are, baby steps is exactly what is needed to make your way back. I came back from near total adrenal exhaustion in 2009, but it honestly took much longer than I wanted to spend to restore my health. i wish you patience with yourself, and trust your body--it has a miraculous ability to heal. Someone with your special talent will always be enthusiastically welcomed back when you are well! Take all the time you need.

BethM said...

I'm glad you're seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, I hope you continue to feel better and better each day!!!

Sharon said...

God bless - just hang in there. Loads of blog readers pulling for you��

Josie McRazie said...

1) it is great to see you!!
Many of us have been there (myself included) and it takes great strength just to admit you are there!! You have more strength than you think! Keep with it and you will get there! I know pulling away is the normal reaction but the help of friends and loved ones really does help! Prayers are with you!

SHALEEN said...

Get well sooner rather than later. Miss your humor and quirkiness.

Jacqueline Frances said...

Hi there Rachel,
I too, have been battling a debilitating illness. All I can say is you have to let go of the strict constructs you place on yourself(as I did) and learn to just get along with what you have. It was so hard for me to give up almost everything, but due to my illness I could not even do the most simplest of things. Housework suffered, I had to give up my job, quilting suffered and so much more.
I am now at the point where I can do one thing a day…yes one, be it write a blog post, cook supper or do some piecing/quilting. I cannot do more than that or I will end up in bed for weeks on end. Maybe you could try just doing one thing a day?
I have really missed your posts and honestly thought you were busy teaching or writing a new book.
My heart goes out to you and know that I really do know how you feel.
Quilty Huggs,
Jacqueline
http://www.quilt-sewhappy.blogspot.com

Fayequilts2 said...

Thinking of you and sending lots of prayers for you to have a speedy recovery very soon!

I've missed hearing from you and all your beautiful quilts you've made. But, just remember we're all patiently waiting you'll be back on your feet soon! Just take one day at a time.....
Faye

Fayequilts2 said...

Hi Rachel!
I forgot to mention how creative you are...I'm so inspired by all your quilts, and so love your site. But, you need to take care of Rachel first, and then the rest will fall in place.

Get well soon!

Faye

mom2three said...

Glad to hear you are feeling better! The best thing about quilting/blogging is that you can take a break and your followers will all still be there, ready to cheer you on when you come back. I hope that someone is making you Mawmaw's biscuits (they're my husband's favorite!) and that you will continue to feel better :)

Marsha said...

I've been where you were and am so thankful that there was "light at the end of the tunnel".. praying for you and your family to have healing and comfort.. can't wait to see future posts and to witness you're feeling better :)

Kim with a K said...

Happy Easter to you and your family and keep on getting healthy!

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